Karl's Thoughts Sometimes Called a Blog
1. the opinions below are the authors
2. they may not necessary be correct
3. and they may be changed without notice
4. in other words this is rambling
1 May 2012
Here are some pictures from our 21 April Conference
25 March 2012
Hurricanes and divorce are similar in Florida - someone is loosing a trailer.
9 Feb 2012
Never Judge Anyone
A doctor entered the hospital in hurry after being called in for an urgent surgery. He answered the call ASAP, changed his clothes and went directly to the surgery block.
He found the boy’s father going and coming in the hall waiting for the doctor. Once seeing him, the dad yelled: “Why did you take all this time to come? Don’t you know that my son’s life is in danger? Don’t you have the sense of responsibility?”
The doctor smiled and said: “I am sorry, I wasn’t in the hospital and I came the fastest I could after receiving the call…… And now, I wish you’d calm down so that I can do my work”
“Calm down?! What if your son was in this room right now, would you calm down? If your own son dies now what will you do??” said the father angrily
The doctor smiled again and replied: “I will say what Job said in the Holy Bible “From dust we came and to dust we return, blessed be the name of God”. Doctors cannot prolong lives. Go and intercede for your son, we will do our best by God’s grace”
“Giving advice when we’re not concerned is so easy” Murmured the father.
The surgery took some hours after which the doctor went out happy, “Thank God! Your son is saved!”
And without waiting for the father’s reply he carried on his way running. “If you have any question, ask the nurse!!”
“Why is he so arrogant? He couldn’t wait some minutes so that I ask about my son’s state” Commented the father when seeing the nurse minutes after the doctor left.
The nurse answered, tears coming down her face: “His son died yesterday in a road accident, he was in the burial when we called him for your son’s surgery. And now that he saved your son’s life, he left running to finish his son’s burial.”
NEVER JUDGE ANYONE because you never know how their life is and as to what is happening or what they’re going through.
27 Jan 2012
Learn from the dog
Being a veterinarian, I had been called to examine a ten-year-old
Irish Wolfhound named Belker. The dog's owners, Ron, his wife Lisa,
and their little boy Shane, were all very attached to Belker, and
they were hoping for a miracle.
I examined Belker and found he was dying of cancer. I told the
family we couldn't do anything for Belker, and offered to perform
the euthanasia procedure for the old dog in their home.
As we made arrangements, Ron and Lisa told me they thought it would
be good for six-year-old Shane to observe the procedure. They felt
as though Shane might learn something from the experience.
The next day, I felt the familiar catch in my throat as Belker 's
family surrounded him. Shane seemed so calm, petting the old dog for
the last time, that I wondered if he understood what was going on.
Within a few minutes, Belker slipped peacefully away.
The little boy seemed to accept Belker's transition without any
difficulty or confusion. We sat together for a while after Belker's
Death, wondering aloud about the sad fact that animal lives are shorter
than human lives.
Shane, who had been listening quietly, piped up, ''I know why.''
Startled, we all turned to him. What came out of his mouth next
stunned me. I'd never heard a more comforting explanation. It has
changed the way I try and live.
He said,''People are born so that they can learn how to live a good
life -- like loving everybody all the time and being nice, right?''
The Six-year-old continued,
''Well, dogs already know how to do that, so they don't have to stay
as long.''
Live simply.
Love generously.
Care deeply.
Speak kindly.
Remember, if a dog was the teacher you would learn things like:
When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.
Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride.
Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure Ecstasy.
Take naps.
Stretch before rising.
Run, romp, and play daily.
Thrive on attention and let people touch you.
Avoid biting when a simple growl will do.
On warm days, stop to lie on your back on the grass.
On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree.
When you're happy, dance around and wag your entire body.
Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.
Be loyal.
Never pretend to be something you're not.
If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it.
When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by, and nuzzle them gently.
19 Dec 2011
Andy Rooney
I've learned.... That the best classroom in the
world is at the feet of an elderly person.
I've learned.... That when you're in love, it shows.
I've learned.... That just one person saying to me, 'You've made my day!'
makes my day.
I've learned.... That having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the
most peaceful feelings in the world.
I've learned.... That being kind is more important than being right.
I've learned.... That you should never say no to a gift from a child.
I've learned.... That I can always pray for someone when I don't have the
strength to help him in some other way.
I've learned.... That no matter how serious your life requires you to be,
everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.
I've learned.... That sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a
heart to understand.
I've learned.... That simple walks with my father around the block on
summer nights when I was a child did wonders for me as an adult.
I've learned.... That life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it
gets to the end, the faster it goes.
I've learned.... That we should be glad God doesn't give us everything we
ask for.
I've learned.... That money doesn't buy class.
I've learned.... That it's those small daily happenings that make life so
spectacular.
I've learned.... That under everyone's hard shell is someone who wants to
be appreciated and loved.
I've learned.... That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.
I've learned.... That when you plan to get even with someone, you are only
letting that person continue to hurt you.
I've learned.... That love, not time, heals all wounds.
I've learned.... That the easiest way for me to grow as a person is to
surround myself with people smarter than I am.
I've learned.... That everyone you meet deserves to be greeted with a
smile..
I've learned.... That no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.
I've learned... That life is tough, but I'm tougher.
I've learned.... That opportunities are never lost; someone will take the
ones you miss.
I've learned.... That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock
elsewhere.
I've learned.... That I wish I could have told my Mom that I love her one
more time before she passed away.
I've learned.... That one should keep his words both soft and tender,
because tomorrow he may have to eat them.
I've learned..... That a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks.
I've learned..... That when your newly born grandchild holds your little
finger in his little fist, that you're hooked for life.
I've learned.... That everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but
all the happiness and growth occurs while you're climbing it.
I've learned.... That the less time I have to work with, the more things I
get done.
18 Dec 2011
Everyone will have bad experiences. Sometimes they are forced on us, sometimes they are a result of the decisions we make. How good our life will be is based on recovering from the bad experiences - they are coming - expect them. Some people never recover, but most people recover within two years, and many times their bad experience is far worse than yours.
Karl Kolmetz
08 Dec 2011
To bring peace to the earth, strive to make your own life peaceful.
Work as if you do not need the money,
Love as if you have never been hurt,
Dance as if no one is looking
01 Dec 2011
Remember Dilbert is just a cartoon - it does not reflect real life
06 September 2011
“There are four ways, and only four ways, in which we have contact with the world. We are evaluated and classified by these four contacts:
what we do,
how we look,
what we say,
and how we say it.”
Dale Carnegie quotes (American lecturer, author, 1888-1955)
05 September 2011
When I was a Boy Scout, we played a game when new Scouts joined the troop. We lined up chairs in a pattern, creating an obstacle course through which the new Scouts, blindfolded, were supposed to maneuver. The Scoutmaster gave them a few moments to study the pattern before our adventure began. But as soon as the victims were blindfolded, the rest of us quietly removed the chairs.
I think life is like this game. Perhaps we spend our lives avoiding obstacles we have created for ourselves and in reality exist only in our minds. We're afraid to apply for that job, take violin lessons, learn a foreign language, call an old friend, write our Congressman - whatever it is that we would really like to do but don't because of personal obstacles. Don't avoid any chairs until you run smack into one. And if you do, at least you'll have a place to sit down.
Pierce Vincent Eckhart
04 September 2011
I have been blessed to be friends with many great people in my life. In 2004 I worked with two Singaporeans that had excellent military training. I have not had very much military training, but these guys were great. I slowly learned several lessons from them, only because I am a slow learner, they were trying to teach me.
1. If you are going to be successful you need a strategy, that increases you chances of success and decreases you chance of failure. Sometimes this requires more than one strategy.
2. Everything thing of value that you wish to keep, that you do have have a strategy to keep secure, you are planning to loose.
3. Everyday that you do not have a strategy for advancement, is a day you wasted.
4. People do not become successful by accident, success is intentional.
03 September 2011
Confucius says: There are two excellent theories for arguing with women. Neither one
works.
01 September 2011
When you pray remember:
God empties before He fills,humbles before He exalts,
prunes before He prospers.
30 August 2011
When asked to recall the most unusual résumés they have received, employers shared the following:
Candidate said the more you paid him, the harder he worked.
Candidate included that he was arrested for assaulting his previous boss.
Candidate said he just wanted an opportunity to show off his new tie.
Candidate listed her dog as reference.
Candidate listed the ability to do the moonwalk as a special skill.
Candidates — a husband and wife looking to job share — submitted a co-written poem.
Candidate included “versatile toes” as a selling point.
Candidate stated she was “particularly adept at comprehending the obvious.”
Candidate said that he would be a “good asset to the company,” but failed to include the “et” in the word “asset.”
Candidate’s email address on the résumé had “shakinmybootie” in it.
Candidate said he was qualified because he was a “marvelous physical specimen.”
Candidate included that she survived a bite from a deadly aquatic animal.
Candidate was fired from different jobs, but included each one as a reference.
Candidate used first name only.
Candidate presented a list of demands in order to work for the organization.
Candidate asked, “Would you pass up an opportunity to hire someone like this? I think not.”
Candidate insisted that the company pay him to interview with them because his time was valuable.
Candidate’s résumé was intentionally written from right to left instead of left to right.
Candidate shipped a lemon with résumé, stating “I am not a lemon.”
Candidate submitted 40-page résumé that included photos and diplomas
28 August 2011
The problem with winning the rat race is you're still a rat.
Lily Tomlin
27 August 2011
Five Simple Rules for Happiness
1. Free your heart from hate
2. Free your mind from worry
3. Live Simple
4. Give More
5. Expect Less
Happiness = Expectation minus reality
Sometime you can change the reality by hard work, many things you cannot change, therefore to be happy you need to adjust your expectations.
19 August 2011
5 RULES TO REMEMBER IN LIFE:
1. Money cannot buy happiness but it’s more comfortable to cry in a Mercedes than on a bicycle.
2. Forgive your enemy but remember the low life's name.
3. Help someone when they are in trouble and they will remember you when they're in trouble again.
4. Many people are alive only because it’s illegal to shoot them.
5. Alcohol does not solve any problems, but then neither does a cup of tea.....
15 August 2001
Marriage From a Childs View
1. HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHOM TO MARRY?
You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like
sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep
the chips and dip coming.
— Alan, age 10
No person really decides before they grow up who they’re going to
marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who
you’re stuck with.– Kristen, age 10
2. WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?
Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then.
— Camille, age 10
3. HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?
You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at
the same kids.
— Derrick, age 8
4. WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON
Both don’t want any more kids.
– Lori, age 8
5. WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?
-Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know
each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough.
— Lynnette, age 8
-On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that usually
gets them interested enough to go for a second date.
— Martin, age 10
6. WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?
-When they’re rich.
— Pam, age 7
The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn’t want to mess with
that.
– - Curt, age 7
-The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry
them and have kids with them. It’s the right thing to do.
– - Howard, age 8
7. IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?
It’s better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone
to clean up after them.
— Anita, age 9
8. HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?
Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a dump
truck.
— Ricky,age 10,
12 August 2011
One ship sails east, another west
On the self-same wind that blows.
It’s the set of the sail and not the gale
That determines where each ship goes.
Ella Wheeler Wilcox
07 August 2011
Interesting Facts have come to light this year.
1. Organic Food is not safe. The bacteria from the organic fertilizer cannot be removed by washing. Some of the bacteria migrates into the vegetables leading to sickness and sometimes deaths.,
2. Consumer Reports rates Japanese Honda Cars with low quality.
31 July 2011
I hate to admit that we have the best leaders in the USA in our congress, but it must be true. Harry Reid is the best we can find?
30 July 2011
Ready or not, some day it will all come to an end.
There will be no more sunrises, no minutes, hours, or days.
All the things you collected, whether treasured or forgotten, will pass to someone else.
Your wealth, fame, and temporal power will shrivel to irrelevance.
It will not matter what you owned or what you were owed.
Your grudges, resentments, frustrations, and jealousies will finally disappear.
So too, your hopes, ambitions, plans, and to-do lists will expire.
The wins and losses that once seemed so important will fade away.
It won't matter where you came from or what side of the tracks you lived on at the end.
It won't matter whether you were beautiful or brilliant.
Even your gender and skin color will be irrelevant.
So what will matter? How will the value of your days be measured?
What will matter is not what you bought, but what you built; not what you got, but what you gave.
What will matter is not your success, but your significance.
What will matter is not what you learned, but what you taught.
What will matter is every act of integrity, compassion, courage, or sacrifice that enriched, empowered, or encouraged others to emulate your example.
What will matter is not your competence, but your character.
What will matter is not how many people you knew, but how many will feel a lasting loss when you're gone.
What will matter is not your memories, but the memories that live in those who loved you.
What will matter is how long you will be remembered, by whom, and for what.
Living a life that matters doesn't happen by accident.
It's not a matter of circumstance but of choice.
Choose to live a life that matters.
Michael Josephson
28 July 2011
I looked at the events in Norway and was thinking - this is not how things should be - and then I begin to think - who should they be?
23 July 2011
We must respect the other fellow's religion, but only in the sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart.
H. L. Mencken
A man may be a fool and not know it, but not if he is married.
H. L. Mencken
17 July 2011
Anyone can achieve their fullest potential, who we are might be predetermined, but the path we follow is always of our own choosing. We should never allow our fears or the expectations of others to set the frontiers of our destiny. Your destiny can't be changed but, it can be challenged. Every man is born as many men and dies as a single one.
15 July 2011
"If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man." Mark Twain
11 July 2011
On the first day, God created the dog and said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years."
The dog said, "That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?"
And God saw it was good.
On the second day, God created the monkey and said, "Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span."
The monkey said, "Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the dog did?"
And God, again saw it was good.
On the third day, God created the cow and said, "You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years."
The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?"
And God agreed it was good.
On the fourth day, God created humans and said, "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years."
But the human said, "Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?"
"Okay," said God, "You asked for it."
So that is why for our first twenty years, we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years, we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years, we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years, we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.
Life has now been explained to you.
There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I'm doing it as a public service. If you are looking for me I will be on the front porch.
1 July 2011
30 June 2011
"The injuries we do and those we suffer are seldom weighed in the same scales”
Aesop
A doubtful friend is worse than a certain enemy. Let a man be one thing or the other, and we then know how to meet him.
Aesop
16th June 2011
Good article from Philip Moeller for U.S. News & World Report on investing.
1. Failing to see the big picture. Considering decisions in isolation and not including their impact on an entire portfolio was cited as a problem. Consequence: Investing too much in a single asset class, industry or geographic market because you know a lot about it and are comfortable with such decisions.
2. Using a short-term decision horizon. Ignoring the appropriate goal of long-term wealth accumulation in favor of short-term returns hindered investors. Consequence: Statistically, losses are more likely in the short run. Because people are twice as sensitive to losses as to gains -- a behavioral phenomenon known as "myopic loss aversion" -- their willingness to take short-term risks is too low and they often make the wrong investment decisions.
3. Buying high and selling low. Investors tend to do what's comfortable amid bullish or bearish market conditions. Consequence: Buying when markets are high or selling when markets are low is a risky strategy that fails to take advantage of market opportunities. A buy-and-hold strategy is superior.
4. Trading too frequently. Multiple emotional and personality traits produce an irrational bias toward action. Consequence: Investment costs are higher, and the frequency of other poor decisions is increased. "This lack of control over our emotions is not an abstract problem," the Barclays study said, and "it can have tangible, detrimental effects on both investor satisfaction and performance."
10th June 2011
Here is proof that the USA is still leading the world in education
20th May 2011
I was able to see Hwaseong Fortress on Saturday. It is a World Heritage Site here in Korea. Impressive wall Fort and City from 1300's.
The bottom part was built in the 1300, the top part later.
To see you need to walk up and down the steps, many steps
This is from the top - you can see the ring wall in the distance
Ring the bell for good luck
21 May 2011
Hope you become healthy
20 May 2011
You've carefully thought out all the angles.
You've done it a thousand times.
It comes naturally to you.
You know what you're doing, its what you've been trained to do your whole life.
Nothing could possibly go wrong, right ?
19 May 2011
Referrals never hurt
26 March 2011
Traveled to USA to see my children, grandchildren and parents.
14 February 2011
"God must love ugly people, He sure made a lot of us."
Karl Kolmetz
07 February 2011
Are You Happy?
The enemy of the best is the good. Sometimes we get side tracked into not doing our best, by doing good - which I guess is better than doing bad. We get so involved in the good that we really miss the significance of life.
Most people lead mechanical lives to bring wealth to others. Those who make use of such people also become lost in the clamor of the machinery.
Most people are the cogs of the machine that bring wealth to others and do good things, but they are not truly happy. They get up every morning - solve the problems which makes the machine run better and produce more wealth.
Many people think that unhappiness is the lot of the poor, and that those who are wealthily, successful and famous much surely enjoy happiness. This is not true, statistics show that the highest rate of suicide occurs among the people who enjoy the highest standard of living.
If is difficult to set a criterion for happiness. If might be easier to work backwards. What is unhappiness? Unhappiness is that you are unsatisfied with your accomplishments and you have high stress which is a lack of peace.
Happiness is satisfaction and peace.
Satisfaction is striving to accomplish worthwhile goals, which is doing the more of the best instead of the good. One can only have satisfaction if they strive to do what they know is the best. Most of the time what is the best involves sacrifice and giving to others, but it is the most rewarding of tasks.
Peace is deliverance from your fears and your past. The fear of failure, the fear of heartache, the past failure, and the past heartache. Peace is only found in forgiveness of yourself and others. Forgiveness does not mean the you forget the past - only that you overcome the bitterness and try to learn as much as you can from the experience.
Do you have satisfaction? If not start doing more of the best - which you already know in your heart what you should do.
Do you have peace? Learn to forgive yourself and others, which is sometime difficult to do.
Are you Happy?
John L Bear University Of Houston - 1984 - Hard to forgive
20 January 2011
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore.
Dream. Discover.
Mark Twain
10 January 2011
We held a Late New Years / Christmas part on 6th January. We have held these for several years -
I had previously hosted New Years Parties in 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2010 and this year 2011 .
02 January 2011
Maxine may be too correct
25 December 2010 - Merry Christmas
Why do we celebrate the holidays? What we celebrate is life, and we remember those who did celebrate life, but can no longer. As for me, I have been very blessed and have been given far more than I deserve. All the best to you and your family in this holiday season.
I have been very lucky in my life to meet some great people on this planet of six billion people. Some of the people of this planet share my genetic material. Like most families, some of this group I claim quickly, others more slowly.
My parents sacrificed for me, and tried to do the best for me. This is what parents do. They do it for no other reason than love. Not for reward, not for recognition.
Some of their advice was great, some was not so good. Parents sometimes make mistakes, but rarely on purpose. There is no instruction book on being a parent, you just try to do the best you can and learn as you go.
Wishing you the timeless treasures of Christmas, the warmth of home, the love of family and the company of good friends.
20 December 2010
In Malaysia this weekend - had my picture made with Santa - not sure who looks the most like Santa.
THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:
1) You believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus..
4) You look like Santa Claus.
Prices in Singapore are becoming crazy - You almost now need to win money at the new casino's to buy ice cream - the exchange rate from Singapore to USD is about 1.3 - so the ice cream is really only USD $17.00 for 2 - still wow.
05 December 2010
Great article of the future of the USA - A country only improves their standard of living by creating things of value - not pieces of paper. If your job only creates pieces of paper - you may not be part of the solution.
I remember when I first came to Asia in 1995, at McDonalds the coffee creamer and sugar were not free and only given when you buy coffee. Now coffee creamer and sugar are free and take all you want like in the USA before. Last time I went back to the USA coffee creamer and sugar are now only given when you buy. Times are changing.
25 November 2010
Thanksgiving Day in the US. It is a day set aside to give thanks to God for our many blessings. I have been very blessed - far beyond what I deserve. Health, strength, good friends - people who love me - more than I deserve.
I also wish to thank the efforts made by my friends and family to increase my personal development and make me a better person - sometime with, and sometimes without success.
The best time to plant an oak tree was twenty years ago, the second best time is today.
Charlie Brown Thanksgiving Prayer
21 November
There are good people in the world, not very many, but they are there. Go find them and make them your friend - by you also being a good person.
Karl Kolmetz
26th September
I remember when Ann Richards was the governor of Texas. Almost every time she spoke I did not like what she had to say. She spoke at my college in 1992 and I rated her speech very poor. But in general I was happy with how she governed Texas.
This week President Obama had a town hall meeting, and I was very happy with most of what he had to say. But if I look at how he governs, I am unhappy. He has spent major dollars to try and kick start the economy, with limited success because of what how he chose to spend the money. He gave the money to the states to keep the state employees on the government payrolls. The problem is that this investment has limited returns.
Simple Investment Rules
1. You cannot consistently spend more money that you collect. This does not need any explanation to any adult.
2. Your investments need to have long term returns - maybe like roads, bridges, and railroads, not keeping someone employed for 12 more months. The states are now starting to reducing staff due to lack of funding.
His solution to this issue is to raise taxes, which may be the only answer since the money has already been spent.
Singapore and Malaysia now keep a now keep a very large cash reserve after the 1998 currency crisis, which crippled their economies for over 5 years. You still can see large deserted building in Malaysia built in the 1995 to 1998 boom.
Japan has had 10 years+ of limited growth because in the 1998 downturn they kept poor investments on the bank books, supported by the government.
At some point this will be a painful lesson for the USA.
18 September
Great article on the web by Richard Wiseman
How to Get Lucky - proof that you make your own breaks.
For centuries, people have recognized the power of luck and have done whatever they could to try seizing it. Take knocking on wood, thought to date back to pagan rituals aimed at eliciting help from powerful tree gods. We still do it today, though few, if any, of us worship tree gods. So why do we pass this and other superstitions down from generation to generation? The answer lies in the power of luck.
Live a Charmed Life
To investigate scientifically why some people are consistently lucky and others aren't, I advertised in national periodicals for volunteers of both varieties. Four hundred men and women from all walks of life -- ages 18 to 84 -- responded.
Over a ten-year period, I interviewed these volunteers, asked them to complete diaries, personality questionnaires and IQ tests, and invited them to my laboratory for experiments. Lucky people, I found, get that way via some basic principles -- seizing chance opportunities; creating self-fulfilling prophecies through positive expectations; and adopting a resilient attitude that turns bad luck around.
Open Your Mind
Consider chance opportunities: Lucky people regularly have them; unlucky people don't. To determine why, I gave lucky and unlucky people a newspaper, and asked them to tell me how many photos were inside. On average, unlucky people spent about two minutes on this exercise; lucky people spent seconds. Why? Because on the paper's second page -- in big type -- was the message "Stop counting: There are 43 photographs in this newspaper." Lucky people tended to spot the message. Unlucky ones didn't. I put a second one halfway through the paper: "Stop counting, tell the experimenter you have seen this and win $250." Again, the unlucky people missed it.
The lesson: Unlucky people miss chance opportunities because they're too busy looking for something else. Lucky people see what is there rather than just what they're looking for.
This is only part of the story. Many of my lucky participants tried hard to add variety to their lives. Before making important decisions, one altered his route to work. Another described a way of meeting people. He noticed that at parties he usually talked to the same type of person. To change this, he thought of a color and then spoke only to guests wearing that color -- women in red, say, or men in black.
Does this technique work? Well, imagine living in the center of an apple orchard. Each day you must collect a basket of apples. At first, it won't matter where you look. The entire orchard will have apples. Gradually, it becomes harder to find apples in places you've visited before. If you go to new parts of the orchard each time, the odds of finding apples will increase dramatically. It is exactly the same with luck.
Relish the Upside
Another important principle revolved around the way in which lucky and unlucky people deal with misfortune. Imagine representing your country in the Olympics. You compete, do well, and win a bronze medal. Now imagine a second Olympics. This time you do even better and win a silver medal. How happy do you think you'd feel? Most of us think we'd be happier after winning the silver medal.
But research suggests athletes who win bronze medals are actually happier. This is because silver medalists think that if they'd performed slightly better, they might have won a gold medal. In contrast, bronze medalists focus on how if they'd performed slightly worse, they wouldn't have won anything. Psychologists call this ability to imagine what might have happened, rather than what actually happened, "counter-factual" thinking.
To find out if lucky people use counter-factual thinking to ease the impact of misfortune, I asked my subjects to imagine being in a bank. Suddenly, an armed robber enters and fires a shot that hits them in the arms. Unlucky people tended to say this would be their bad luck to be in the bank during the robbery. Lucky people said it could have been worse: "You could have been shot in the head." This kind of thinking makes people feel better about themselves, keeps expectations high, and increases the likelihood of continuing to live a lucky life.
Learn to Be Lucky
Finally, I created a series of experiments examining whether thought and behavior can enhance good fortune.
First came one-on-one meetings, during which participants completed questionnaires that measured their luck and their satisfaction with six key areas of their lives. I then outlined the main principles of luck, and described techniques designed to help participants react like lucky people. For instance, they were taught how to be more open to opportunities around them, how to break routines, and how to deal with bad luck by imagining things being worse. They were asked to carry out specific exercises for a month and then report back to me.
The results were dramatic: 80 percent were happier and more satisfied with their lives -- and luckier. One unlucky subject said that after adjusting her attitude -- expecting good fortune, not dwelling on the negative -- her bad luck had vanished. One day, she went shopping and found a dress she liked. But she didn't buy it, and when she returned to the store in a week, it was gone. Instead of slinking away disappointed, she looked around and found a better dress -- for less. Events like this made her a much happier person.
Her experience shows how thoughts and behavior affect the good and bad fortune we encounter. It proves that the most elusive of holy grails -- an effective way of taking advantage of the power of luck -- is available to us all.
22 August 2010
"Life is not fair, but it is still good."
20 August 2010
By the age of 54 "happy hour" has a new meaning - it now means nap time.
15 August 2010
It seems that when I stand next to someone to take a picture, they always look better than me. At the grocery store this week there was a mascot. I decided to have my picture taken with him to see if he would look better, sure enough, he looked better standing beside me.
08 August 2010
It seems in dealing with most people, friends, family, and spouse - there are times you will be hurt, make sure the person is of value and worth the suffering.
6 August 2010
SUCCESS:
At age 04 success is . . . Not wetting your pants.
At age 12 success is . . . Having friends.
At age 16 success is . .. Having a driver's license.
At age 35 success is . . . Having money.
At age 50 success is . . . Having money..
At age 70 success is . .. .Having a drivers license.
At age 75 success is . ... Having friends.
At age 80 success is . . ..Not wetting your pants.
THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:
1) You believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus..
4) You look like Santa Claus.
GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED:
1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats..
2) When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.
3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.
4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair..
7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.
8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk..
9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandma's lap.
GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:
1) Raising teenagers is like nailing jelly to a tree.
2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts
4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground...
5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy..
GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD
1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional...
2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.
4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions...
6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician
7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes without the wisdom.
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